Category Archives: family

I Can’t Stand My Mother-in-Law

July 10, 2009family, Wedded BlissKirsetin

No, no, not me! That’s not my sentiment. (Hello, Mother-in-Law, Faithful Reader that you are.) But it’s a sentiment that’s echoed in women’s circles day in and day out. When it comes to the women who raised our husbands, there’s rarely middle ground. As newlyweds, we try to embrace one another’s families. We put on our manners, our best game face, and avoid discussing “hot button” topics. We try, as new wives, we really do. But in time, we discover that people are people. There are bound to be disagreements.

Love ‘em or loathe ‘em, they’re here to stay. And we should be glad for that—because if all goes well, one day we’ll be the mother-in-law. M-I-L’s to-be, that’s us. Needless to say, it’s to our benefit to figure out how to live with them. Not literally, of course (!), but to survive, and even thrive, as part of the same family.

Today, over at Blissfully Wed, I offer a few suggestions for navigating these waters. Hope you’ll pop by and read ’em.

photo credit: blhphotography

Inexpensive Family Fun: 5 Frugal Ideas

June 30, 2009activities for kids, family, financesKirsetin

Do recent economic woes have you wondering what to do with the kids this summer? Here are 5 ideas to help you forgo expensive camps and memberships and indulge in some old-fashioned, inexpensive, family fun.

1. Pack a Picnic. For the same amount of money it would cost you to eat at home, in the same humdrum kitchen, at the same humdrum hour, you can pack it all up in a basket and head out the door for a new adventure. Grab your basket and set out for the nearest beach, lake, or stream. Doing so also means free (or inexpensive) water fun – easy hours of entertainment for kids of all ages. If the cost of gas and/or distance of a body of water makes this idea prohibitive, forgo the water and find a nearby park. The simple change of mealtime venue is a surefire way to lift everyone’s spirits.
Hit the Nature Trails. Grab your hiking boots or tennis shoes, pack some water and a camera, and head for the Great Outdoors. Not since Thoreau wrote Walden has anyone come close to describing the wonder of communing with nature. And though few of us will ever forsake civilization for the woods for as long as he did, his words help us understand the depth of this beauty. “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” We can help our kids develop a love for the outdoors by getting them out of the house and into the woods early and often. Let them lead a hike, explore the trails, discover new worlds: this is learning and living at its finest.
Kitchen Concoctions. This idea isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s not my favorite, either, but the kids love it. Gather up some slightly stale marshmallows, old graham crackers, fruit, whipped cream, sugar, salt, vinegar and other inexpensive, or unlikely to be used soon, foods. Then let the kids mix and create to their hearts content. They can concoct some disgusting stuff, let me tell you, but they loooove this “game.” Just don’t hand them the vanilla. That takes frugal out of the equation.
Kick, Serve, or Shoot a Ball. Research study after research study laments the growing obesity problem of America’s youth. Go against the grain and get out there and play sports with your kids. Take an hour—or a half an hour—to shoot baskets, kick goals, or volley at the net. You don’t need a fancy club membership. Most towns have free public tennis courts and basketball courts; plenty of schools have soccer fields that sit empty all summer long. Grab a few of your kids’ friends and get a game going. You’ll thank me later, I promise.
Read A Book. Everyone knows that libraries lend books for free, but not everyone goes. Go! Choose a book you can read aloud to your kids and spend some time each day transported to another world together. A few suggestions: The Tale of Despereaux (Kate DiCamillo), A Cricket in Times Square (George Selden), The Magician’s Nephew (C. S. Lewis), Half Magic (Edward Eager).

These changing economic times don’t mean less family fun, but they might mean a bit more work on our part, as parents. The farm where we picked strawberries this year puts it like this:

You pick, you pay. We pick, you pay more.

I love that line. That’s life, right? When we do the legwork, we pay less.

What’s true for berry pickers is true for family entertainment: it’s more work to pack a picnic than to drive through McDonald’s, but it’s less expensive and, in the end, it’s better for all of us and a lot more fun. So break out the bread, folks, and get packing.

photo credits: Crystl, KitAy

The Start of Summer, Boys, Me, and Football

June 17, 2009family, friendship, sportsKirsetin

Know what I love best about this time of year? No alarm clock! That’s right. I will eke every extra second I can out of a cool summer morning, breeze blowing, sun shining through the window, kids still quiet. It’s the most peace I get. Ever. And I love it.

Last week was our first week without school, but instead of relaxing at home we decided to make the usually 11 ½ hour-but-this-time-13-hour-trek to Virginia to see my parents. It was just the boys and me–my husband is smart that way. The boys had a great time playing basketball with my dad,

hiking through the woods with my mom,

and sightseeing with both of them.

They also enjoyed golfing and making disgusting creations in my mother’s kitchen, but I stayed far away from that. Instead, I had a great time not being in charge of dinner and running away to visit old friends.

Those two things come pretty close to leisurely mornings on the Great Things in Life chart, don’t you think?

This week, we returned for soccer tryouts.

Except it turns out that we didn’t need to, because my son has decided to forgo travel soccer this year in favor of football this fall. Does this make me nervous? Do you know me at all? Yes, yes, it makes me very nervous. But I understand well the desire of an almost teenager to play the sport many of his friends play. I understand the need to discover, for yourself, what you’re capable of. I understand that this is only partly about sports, and more about life lessons, which is the only reason I’m on board. So this fall, we’ll have not one, but two boys in football, and one little guy still scoring on the soccer field.

It will be a nice change, I think. After I got over my initial surprise, I began to look forward to a year without the year-round soccer commitment. More time for play. More time for other sports. More time for skiing! More time for lots of other interests.

Now that’s something I can cheer for.